Red 2
by Jesters Folly
Summary: When Dex-Starr finds a pile of damaged power rings and no wearers he goes to the only other red lantern he can find. It's down to Red Floof and Dex-Starr to find out what is going on and their only clue is the hologram of a very annoying toaster.
1. Chapter 1 - Dex-Starr

Chapter 1 – Dex-Starr

"What is it?" Dex-Starr growled

"Available information indicates that it is a distress signal." The power ring replied.

"From master's ring?"

"Negative, the signal is coming from an unknown technology but is emanating from the same co-ordinates as the last signal from Atrocitus' ring."

The grey cat growled and continued padding across the barren landscape only stopping when a movement caught the corner of his eye and, turning, he stood and watched as a brown, hessian bag blew across the windless landscape. Tendrils of anger crept into the cat's mind as his thoughts started to drift to the similar bag he had once been tied up in. The bag rolled and bounced out of sight and Dex-Starr continued on his way.

Dex-Starr looked down as something crunched under his paw, a dented, broken power ring lay on the ground with no sign of its owner, looking around Dex-Starr saw a desert of spent power rings littering the ground around him. Using his own ring, Dex-Starr scooped up a number of the rings and put all but one in a bag constructed from red light then he turned the remain ring in the air.

"What's wrong with it?" He purred

"The power ring shows evidence of over load." Came the replied from his own ring.

"How's that even possible" Dex-Starr asked

"The ring's wearer must have produced an extreme amount of anger in an instant. It is likely that something provoked them. I suggest caution."

Ears twitching, Dex-Starr tracked the source of the distress signal until he came to the source of the distress signal, the signal was coming from a cylinder which tapered to a smooth point at both ends, there were what looked like air vents in the centre of the cylinder. As he was about to raise the strange device out of the ground, Dex-Starr was distracted by a movement to his right, as he watched a hessian bag rolled around the ground and came to a stop just in front of him. Approaching, Dex-Starr noticed the slight movement of something trapped within the bag and his memories drifted back to the men who had once trapped him in a similar bag with the intention of throwing him into the nearest river. He remembered he had only survived due to the timely arrival of his own power ring.

"Warning, anger levels rising." Stated his power ring.

Strange mewing sounds started to emanate from the bag and the cat sped up as the bag seemed to blow away from him. Every time he began to gain on the bag it sped up or changed direction. All the while the mewing grew louder and more desperate

"Anger levels spiking, approaching ring's tolerance levels."

The bag stopped and Dex-Starr pounced forward, claws ready to rip into the material, to free whatever was trapped inside when the bag flipped over, instead of the sealed opening Dex-Starr had expected to see he found himself faced with a tooth filled mouth which opened wide as a brown, knobbly tube shot out. Unable to stop Dex-Starr twisted in the air, slashing at the tube, a horrendous scream emanated from the bag as the cat's claws made contact with the strange appendage. Dex-Starr landed and turned to face the bag just as it started swelling and bulging, stunned the Dex-Starr watched as the bag stretched in every direction, accompanied by the sounds of cracking bones and gushing wind. After reaching three times its original size the bag began to fold and bend, forming a body and four feet, its hessian texture changing to mated fur until it became a large dog, the strange tube hanging where its tongue should be.

"You dare mock Dex-Starr, you try to make me angry by showing me the bag. You think I will show you fear because you now look like this creature. I am Dex-Starr, the angriest kitty in the universe."

The dog creature moved forward emitting a low growl that sounded like the word 'angry', the tongue/tube began to rise and move towards the angry cat. As the tube moved forward Dex-Starr felt himself convulse, his blood began to boil rise in his throat. As tube shot out of the dog's mouth Dex-Starr pushed the blood in his mouth out, vomiting red, burning plasma over the strange creature. The dog howled in pain, gave Dex-Star one last look then it's back opened up to reveal a pair of wings and it flew off into space.

"Warning, anger levels approaching critical, advice, regroup and find help and information before giving chase."

Turning, Dex-Starr growled agreement to his ring and returned to destress beacon.

"Where is the nearest red lantern?"

"The only detectable active lantern is new recruit 'Red Floof'. Currently situated and the planet earth."

With a sigh, Dex-Starr raised himself in to the air and, dragging the beacon behind him, headed to Earth.


	2. Chapter 2 - Distress Call

Chapter 2 – Distress Call

"What do you mean 'There's nothing you can do" Red Floof yelled.

"Miss You've just watch me cut it. Every time I cut any of your hair there's a crackle, some red-light flashes and it's back again." The hair dresser whined.

"Not good enough." Red Floof growled, lifting the hair dresser up by her throat.

"What, what do you expect me to do about it. It keeps growing back." Choked the hair dresser

"This place is filled with alien tech and more magic than hell and you clam you have no way of cutting my hair." Red Floof raised her hand and let the red energy run along her fingers until it formed into a claw.

"Miss Floof! Put that hair dresser down, this isn't what we talked about."

The voice bellowed down the corridor and a path formed in the gathering onlookers. A murmur of surprised passed through the crowd and many ran as Harley Quinn stormed through them, a large hammer thrown over her shoulder.

"I told you come here to see if there was anything out people could do, I didn't expect to be called off duty because you're in the process of gutting the local stylist."

"Incompetent Stylist, she can't even cut my hair." Grumbled Red Floof.

"Now that's not fair, is it? Peoples bodies are affected by their powers and the effects of the exobits are still being studied. You also have the ring. I understand that that affects you physically."

"You're well informed, for a clown lady."

Harley and Red Floof looked around for the speaker.

"Kitty!" Harley exclaimed bending down to pick up pick up Dex-Starr.

"Hands off." Dex-Starr hissed, swiping at Harley Quinn. "The Clown girl is right, the ring corrupts our bodies and, as it seems your hair is one of the sources of your anger it will keep it long."

"Until she can displace her anger elsewhere." Finished Harley.

"You seem quite knowledgeable on the subject." The grey cat growled

"Well I am her psychiatrist." Harley Quinn said with some pride.

"Lucky you." Dex-Starr said laughed. "Anyway, this is wasting time. Put that woman down and come with me, we have work to do."

"What?" Red Floof asked then, realising she was still holding the hair dresser she lowered her down. "What do you mean 'work to do'?"

"We'll talk about it, but somewhere more private."

"There are some spare offices next to the central hub. Follow me." As she spoke Harley Quinn turned and skipped down the corridor, Red Floof and Dex-Starr followed leaving the slightly dishevelled hair dresser mumbling about needing a new job.

"So, what is it?" Red Floof asked picking the cylinder off the meeting room table.

"We don't know, even my ring can't identify it." Dex-Starr replied.

"But I thought our rings had records of most of the tech they came in contact with."

"They do. They also have info on most of the life forms we've met but it can't id the one that attacked me." Dex-Starr said with a growl.

"I though you said it was a dog that came out of the bag" Red Floof said, puzzled.

"No, the dog was the bag, the bag turned into the dog, and it had some kind of feeding tube instead of its tongue. It was some kind of shapeshifter. The ring thinks it was using shapes that would provoke an emotion, not sure why though."

"Well anyway there's more to the distress signal than you've got but there is also something else I can't access. If I can just get this. Ah yes here we go."

The cylinder gave a click as Red Floof cleaned the dust from a small button, a series of lights lit up.

"This a distress call from the mining ship 'Red Dwarf'. Our original crew are dead, killed by radiation leak. All that remains are; Dave Lister, the last human, Arnold Rimmer, a hologram of his dead roommate, A creature that evolved from his pet cat and a Kryten, a service 4000 mechanoid. The ship has recently been infested by Polymorphs and so the crew has been placed into stasis for their own protection. I have set a course towards a radiation belt in the hope of killing off the unwanted passengers."

Without warning the message stopped.

"What the fuck, what does it mean 'the last human', there's a planet full of humans above us, hell I'm human!" Red Floof exclaimed

"You don't look human." Dex-Starr purred looking up, then before Red Floof could reply added. "Besides it could be from the future or another reality."

"Well, all that's beyond me. All we know is that there is a ship and what attacked you is probably one of those Polymorph thingies. If we want to know anything else we need to get someone to look at it. I suggest R & D."


	3. Chapter 3 - Light Bee

Chapter 3 – Light Bee

"Well, we've run a number of tests and we're still not truly certain of the devices original use. What we can tell you is this, the destress call is incomplete, there is some other program in there as well, it looks like the device is missing some memory and a smaller program than intended has been uploaded, at best guess it's some kind of hologram but it's incredibly advanced. This here seems to be a light projector but it's been damaged, probably from when it hit the planet. Apart from that, well it's been around for a long time, from what we can tell it's around 3, maybe 3 and half million years old." The technician said.

"So, it is from the future?" Red Floof asked.

"Yes, well no, well kind a'. It's from the future in a different reality."

"How can you be sure?" Dex-Starr asked

"Simple, Eobard Thawne has done quite a lot of research on the subject and, being a member of the league of villains we have access to his notes."

"What the hell kind of name is Eobard?" Dex-Starr snorted

"It's a future name!" Red Floof and the technician shouted in unison.

"He goes by the Revers Flash at the moment. Can we turn it on? Get to whatever program is inside."

"Not unless we can find a way of integrating a light source here." The Technician pointed at the damage to the edge of the cylinder. "Then we'd have to find a way of getting the light to match up with the program." The Technician paused, then added. "Say, don't your rings produce a light that can be shaped."

"Ahh, well we can't take our rings off. There may be a bit of power in one of these though." Dex-Starr shut off the red-light bag on his back sending power rings over the research table. The technician placed the cylinder on the desk and started rummaging through the rings, looking up at Dex-Starr he made to speak but was cut off by Red Floof

"Look, there, those two are moving, the cylinder is attracting them."

As they watched two of the rings slowly raced towards the cylinder, the winning one attaching itself to the damaged projection area. With some effort the cylinder rose and sleek, straight lines began to form around it.

"Er, did any one notice what kind of ring it was?" Dex-Starr asked

"I thought you said they were red ones, like ours." Red Floof answered

"No. I said I'd been tracking the red lanterns but I found a mixture of rings on the planet."

"Great." Red Floof sighed

"Does it make much difference?" The technician asked.

"Of course, each ring is linked to an emotion depending on what ring has bonded with the program will depend on how it will react to us." Red Floof explained

"Well it's too late now. What is that?" Dex-Starr said, puzzled.

Where the cylinder was now hung the image of a grey smooth rectangle with curved corners on the top, the top surface had two slots in the top and the front had two dials and two leavers, one for each slot.

"It looks like, like some kind of a toaster." The technician said.

"Who would make a hologram of a…."

"TALKIE TALKIE TOASTER." The voice cut of Red Floof's train of thought. "You have overcome the fear of a pointless existence, of death and disassembly and have risen to aid your crew members on a number of occasions. You have been found worthy."

The metallic grey of the toaster shimmered with a yellow energy, a yellow circle appeared on the side of the toaster in the centre of which formed another circle, two lines formed out of the centre circle curving to just above the centre point of the outside circle, two more lines formed on the top of the central circle which were then topped off with a curved line. The toaster turned in the air until its dials faced the gathered technicians and villains.

"Howdy doodly doo I'm Talkie Talkie Toaster, do you want some toast?"

"What the hell is that thing? And why do I know it's going to be more annoying than her." Red Floof exclaimed, pointing to Harley Quinn.

"I er, I believe it said its name was Talkie Toaster." One of the technicians stammered

"I know what it said but why the hell would someone send a Squaky toaster with a distress call." Red Floof shouted.

"What I want to know is how it's just floating there." The second Technician waved his hand around the toaster.

"It's Talkie Talkie Toaster and I can hear everything you say you know. Do you want a muffin?"

"We work with aliens, speedsters and people from the future, there's a talking cat sitting on the R & D table who I know could kick both of our asses and you're puzzled by a flying toaster." The first technician said, his partner just grunted.

Dexx-Star stretched out, "It could be the ring that's making it float, flight is one of the shared powers of all power rings."

"What I wana' know is where it came from, I mean there's no way it could have fitted in that small tube." The group fell silent at Harley's question. Red Floof poked at the toaster which moved at her touch.

"Well you feel solid, what are you?" She asked

"I've already told you, I'm a Talkie Talkie Toaster A.I. system K177, well kinda'."

"What do you mean 'kinda'." Dexx-Star asked, floating up to the Toaster

"Well I was damaged in the attack. Holly managed to upload my program to one of the spare Hard Light Bees and shot me towards the nearest planet to find some intelligent life, something I seemed to have failed at."

"So yeah' a Hologram?" Harley asked.

"Yes." The Toaster replied.

"Which means you're made of light?"

"That's what a hologram is." The toaster continued. "Although, in my case I'm hard light so, unlike normal holograms I can touch things."

"But." Red floof said, still poking the Toaster. "If you're made of light how can you cook toast?"

"I can't."

"Then what is the point of a toaster that can't cook any toast?" Red floof pushed down one of the toasting leavers.

"Do you want some toast?" the toaster asked, a small amount of hope in its voice.

"No, I just don't see the point of sending a toaster that can't cook toast."

"Well if you don't want any toast it doesn't matter does it. Anyway, like I said I was sent to get help."

"Help with what?" Dex-Starr Purred.

"Polymorph's." The toaster wined. "A whole nest of Polymorphs."

"What's a Polymorph" Harley asked

"Shape changing creatures that feed off emotions. We have to find them before they get to feed."

"Well I think that ship has sunk." Hissed Dex-Starr.

"Why?" the toaster hummed.

"Because they met a group of Lanterns on the moon."

"And?"

"And," Dex-Starr sighed "Lanterns use emotions to power their rings. You must be able to feel it, the yellow ring that powers you, it's running off your fear."

The toaster spun in the air, seeming to consider this. "Shit." Was the only thing it said.


	4. Chapter 4 The Oath

**Chapter 4 The oath**

"We will check it out but I need to get some equipment first."

Talkie Talkie Toaster, Dex-Starr and Red Floof were standing around a small R&D table in Red Floof's, the floor and surrounding shelves were littered with scrap metal, components and exobit canisters. Red Floof strapped gloves containing hand blasters to her wrists

**"**Why do you insist on still using primitive weapons?" Dex-Starr hissed.

**"**I just don't want to be caught short, if it's a long battle this could drain." Red Floof waved her ringed hand at the grey/blue cat.

"Speaking of which come with me."

Without looking back Red Floof went to a room with a large four poster bed and a large T.V. on the wall. She pulled the T.V. forward and it Dex-Starr watched as it came away on a metallic arm revealing a hole in the wall in which sat the power battery Dex-Starr had given her.

"Need a re-charge" She said with a smile, with a nod Dex-Starr moved his tail so his ring was facing the battery and both the cat and the tiger women began to chant.

**"With** blood and rage of crimson red,

Ripped from a corpse so freshly dead,

Together with our hellish hate,

We'll burn you all – That is your fate."

"Hey, can the flying appliance use our battery?" Red Floof asked

"No chance," Dex-Starr purred, "The emotions aren't compatible. It's a good point though, will he even make the journey. Toaster, ask the ring how much power you have."

"Ring is operating at one hundred and thirty three percent."

"How can you have more than a hundred percent power?" The toaster asked.

"A large surge of fear was sent through this ring just before disconnection from my previous user, the power was stored but may have caused damage to this unit." Reported the ring.

"Well that means you may be some help then" Dex-Starr sneered, "Let's go."

As the party headed to the door Red Floof stopped and picked up what looked like a giant beetle shell and started to strap it to her back mumbling "This may come in useful," running she caught up with the others.

If anyone had looked up to the sky they would have seen three stripes of light, two red and one yellow but, as this was Gotham they probably wouldn't have paid them much attention.


	5. Chapter 5 - First Encounter

**Chapter 5 - First Encounter**

After the initial shock of not needing any kind of protection other than the ring from the harshness of space Red Floof found that they made incredible time and, within a few hours she found herself standing on the surface of the small moon Dex-Starr had encountered the polymorph. If she was being honest the moon was disappointment, just barren rocks and, if it wasn't for the power rings littering the ground, she was sure there was nothing of interest.

"Your ring must be wrong, the dwarf is in orbit around this moon."

The Toaster and Dex-Starr had started arguing almost as soon as they had landed and Red Floof had move off to look around.

"My ring is NOT wrong, there is nothing in orbit. How big is this thing anyway?"

"Around six miles long, you can't miss it." The Toaster replied.

Well it's not there, use your ring to check if you don't believe me."

Red Floof tuned the argument out as her ears twitched, the faint sound of crying coming from around a nearby rocky outcrop, slowly she crept around the outcrop and was surprised to find herself facing a small girl holding a headless doll. As the girl looked up Red Floof felt her orange fur bristle as a feeling of unease. Moving closer, Red Floof noticed that the girl had scratches down the left side of her face.

"Hello sweetie, what happened?"

"The kitty scratched me." The girl sobbed. "I was cold and alone. I just wanted to be friends but when I went to stroke it, it scratched me. I'm just so lonely." The girl's sobs turned to a loud wail and Red Floof felt a pang of sadness that was quickly suppressed by the anger of her ring.

"Where's the cat now, did it run off?"

It's over there, arguing with the toaster. The kitty that came with you."

"Warning, something is wrong, unusual emotional imbalance detected." The ring spoke in voice so quiet only Red Floof could hear it. Turning g to look back where she came from Red Floof said

"Dex-Starr, no it couldn't be him, he hasn't left the toaster since we got here."

"Not now, the last time it was here. I just wanted to play, to feed." The girl's voice seemed to be changing, growing ruff. "I must need to feed, fear or sadness."

Red Floof turned around to see the girls widened and split open to let tube of vainy flesh shoot out towards her. Moving quickly Red Floof caught the tube,as soon as she touched it she felt the slither of sadness leave her.

"Not enough, where's the sadness, why aren't you sad." The girl's voice reached a high squeal. Red light flowed out of Red Floofs ring, down her hand and formed a gauntlet ending in sharp claws.

"Sorry I only do anger." Her hand shot forward leaving deep cuts in the girl's face.

"Not you as well" The girl screamed, her body contorted and shrank as she turned into a large bird which tried to fly away. Finding it was unable to get away as Red Floof still held it's feeding tube the polymorph flew towards her, turning into a spikey ball as it did, catching Red Floof in the sid of ner face as she tried to dodge it. Quickly recovering, the red claws dissolved as the light spread down to form a flail which Red Floof swung at the spikey ball.

"What was that?" Dex-Starr looked around from the toaster.

"What?" Talkie Toaster turned to face his dials in the direction the cat was looking.

"Sounds like fighting." The cat hung in the air, his ears twitchy g as they searched for the sound.

"Say where the furry woman is?" the toaster asked.

"What, dam ring locate Red Floof."

Dex-Starr and the toaster followed the beam of light that came out of the ring. Rounding a crop of rocks, they saw Red Floof holding a strange spikey ball with under formed tentacles.

"Hi guy's, I think I found one of you shape shifting things."

Talkie Toaster floated forward. "Ring, is this a polymoph."

"Yes, life form matches your memories of a polymorph. Possibly an infant or young child."

"Yeah, well it said it knew you." Red Floof threw the body at Dex-Starr's feet "It tried to eat my sadness but couldn't make me feel enough to satisfy it. What I don't get is why it didn't feed off my anger, there would have been enough to fill it for days."

"A polymorph can only feed off emotions it has stimulated. If it is the one you encountered earlier it probably thought better of going for anger again." Talkie toaster suggested.

"A lot of good that did it." Red Floof laughed.

"Right let's find the rest of these things." Dex-Starr adjusted the bag on his back and headed back off into space.


	6. Chapter 6 - Emohawk

Chapter 6 – Emohawk

"What the hell is that?" Red Floof hissed, her voice carried to the others via her ring.

"That beautiful lump is my ship, the Red Dwarf." The Toaster replied.

"How can something that big move, let alone take off. Come to think of it where the hell would you find the room to build something like that?"

"It doesn't take off; it was built in space. Isn't that the normal procedure in this reality?"

Dex-Starr Looked at Red Floof, "I forgot, this is your first time in space isn't it. You've seen space ships before though." He purred.

"Yes, I've seen those dam Branica ships but even they have a certain aesthetic look. I mean he has that whole 'face and brain dome' theme going on. That things just hideous and what's that, does it have a meteor embedded in it?"

"A small moon actually" the toaster chirped.

"Great, just great." Mumbled Red Floof. "So, what next?"

"Next we go aboard and see if we can get Holly on line." The Toaster sighed.

"And then?" Red Floof asked

"And then we go after the polymorphs."

A growl of satisfaction came from Dex-Starr.

"Odd, Starbug 1 and the Blue midget are both missing. I can't see whey the crew would have left, especially in two craft." Talkey Toaster said as they found the shuttle bay doors open.

"They were probably over whelmed." Dex-Starr Growled

"If that's the case then it's unlikely they were in their right mind." The toaster said, "Still, it's likely they have gone somewhere, Polymorphs only take one emotion at a time which means their victims remain alive but with major personality changes."

"So, they don't kill their victims? The one on that moon seemed to want me dead." Red Floof asked.

"You were a threat, most lifeforms will kill in self-defence but no, normally a Polymorph won't kill on purpose. Their pray may end up dead once they lost an emotion or two due to reckless behaviour or, if they lose to many emotions the victim will just sit down or wonder around until they starve. With no emotion there is no will to survive."

"There's another problem, fur us two anyway." Dexx-Star grumbled, his voice quiet with worry, "All those dead rings on the moon back there."

"What about them?" Red Floof asked.

"A Red Lanterns heart and blood is replaced by the ring, that's where the plasma you spit comes from, it's our blood. If we lose the ring then we no longer have a heart, if we have no heart, well I don't know many species that can live without one."

"So, we have no way of surviving without the ring, none at all?" Red Floof asked

"It has happened, once or twice. Normally with the aid of other Lanterns but, even if that were to happen, you'd be powerless, in space and fighting these creatures. So I suggest that, unless you have a second heart somewhere, you don't let that overload."

The yellow light of the holographic toaster mixed with the dull emergency lighting making visibility difficult as the party moved almost silently through the ship.

"Where are we going?" Red Floof asked

"The rest of the crew were meant to report to the stasis chambers. Holly had hoped that, if they were frozen in time the Polymorphs wouldn't be able to detect their emotions. I don't think we'll find anything but we can get to the mainframe room from there and see if we can boot Holly back up."

"Holly?" growled Dex-Starr

"Holly is the ships computer. An AI that is supposed to have the intelligence of 6000, but I wouldn't trust him to butter a piece of toast that's already been buttered."

"And you think he can help?" Red Floof grumbled.

"He should be able to tell us what happed." The Toaster replied.

The toaster and Dex-Starr floated down the corridor. Red Floof was bringing up the rear when her ear twitched, something was scrabbling along the corridor behind them barely audible over the humming of the engines. As the sickly light from the Toaster moved down the corridor the shadows began to creep back and, as she watched one of the shadows detached itself and pounced at Red Floof. Squealing she jumped back and manifested a flail out of red light, the shadow tried to move but was to slow. The spiked ball hit the shape and, taking it with it thudded in to the wall. A strange feeling overcame Red Floof.

"What was that?" Dex-Starr back down the corridor, the yellow light of the toaster floating slowly behind him.

"Something was following us. I took care of it." Red Floof purred, dismissing the flail.

"It was small, what is it? Another child." Dex-Starr examined the remains on the on the wall.

"No." Yellow tentacles formed around the base of the toaster and lifted the remains of the creature's head off the wall, "This is an Emohawk."

"A what now?" Dex-Starr hissed.

"An Emohawk. Look the original Polymorphs were created by humans as weapons but they were to powerful. After realising their mistake their creators tried to exterminate them but the Polymorphs were more intelligent and hard wearing than expected. Even if they were caught the Polymorphs shapeshifting and emotional manipulation made it almost impossible to kill them so they either escaped again or were imprisoned and shot off into deep space."

"Great let someone else clean up the mess. A very human way of thinking." Dexx-Start said with a huff.

"Well that's thing, "The Toaster continued, "It was believed that they would starve. After all the only life out there is a hand full of rouge simulants and a few Glefs. It's not like they would run into any kind of civilisation."

"Why not? And what's a Glef" Asked Dex-Starr

"A G.E.L.F. You know a Genetically Engineered Life Form, a creature manufactured for a specific job or purpose. They were used for a bit instead of Androids. That is until someone decided they should have more, or any, rights, then they became too expensive so people went back to the robots. You don't have those here?"

Dex-Starr shook his head at the Toasters question "And no one was worried any other race would get their hands on the Polymorphs?" Dexx-Stars ears twitched as he asked the question.

"What other life forms, the universe is totally uninhabited by anything other than Humans and their creations." The Toaster answered.

"I know quite a few people that would disagree." Dex-Starr mumbled.

"Anyway," Continued Talky. "One day a party of Gelfs found a starving Polymorph and fed it. Instead of killing them the Polymorph stayed with them and became domesticated, the Gelf's discovered two things; one the Polymorphs can share any emotion they have. So they can cause someone to be happy or sad. Two the Polymorphs can be used as a hunter. If you give one a taste of an emotion, then they can hunt the owner down even through space. That." The Toaster pointed with one of the yellow tentacles "was probably hunting one of the crew."

"So, there's still some one alive on this ship?" Dex-Starr asked.

"Probably," Replied the Toaster.

"How do we find out who?" Dex-Starr looked at the Toaster

"We can't. If we were around when it died, then we could have analysed any emotion it released."

"How?" Dex-Starr's Ears started twitching.

"Easy, on death a Polymorph of any type releases the emotions they carry back into the environment. An Emohawk releases the emotion to the next closest thing, they normally hunt in packs so a pack mate would normally pick up on the left overs and continue the hunt."

"And if there's no other Emohawk?"

"I just told you," Sighed the Toaster. "The emotion will go into the nearest living thing."

"Like whatever killed it. Say a dumb furry human with a complex about her hair."

"Yes, a bit specific but if the Emohawk was killed by a dumb furry…" The Toaster trailed off and tuned to look at Red Floof who was busy licking a patch of hair on her arm. Suddenly she looked up, her face contorted as if she had a bad taste in her mouth. Dex-Starr flung himself at the Toaster, knocking it out of the way as a stream of red-hot plasma spewed from Red Floofs mouth.

"What the Fu." Talky started as red light ran down the cat-woman's arm, forming claws at the ends of her fingers. Without a word Red Floof pounced at the polymorph behind them as it tried to shake off the plasma. Before the creature had time to respond Red Floof dug her clawed hand under its chin and yanked up, pulling its head from its body.

"You're a bit slow today, boys." She said then she threw the head to the floor, licked her hand and dragged it through her hair which cracked with red light and straighten as her hand passed through it. Dex-Starr stared at her in bewilderment as she groomed herself.

"Whats gotten into you?" He purred.

"I think I know." The Toaster said as he floated over to Red Floof. "How are you feeling?"

"Bad." Red Floof answered without looking up, "Good." She added

"Sexy & Self Important?" The Toaster asked.

Red Floof Nodded.

"Well then, the Emohawk must have been hunting the Cat. Let's get to the stasis booth and get Holly back up, he should be able to track him from there."

As they walked down the corridor Red Floofs cloths cracked with red light and began to change.


	7. Chapter 7 - Queeg

Chapter 7 - Queeg

Dex-Starr could see that there should have been three stasis booths in the room, however one was missing and looked as if it had been ripped from the wall, one was empty, the door was hanging off but the third contained a woman.

"Kristine Kochanski." The Toaster stated, "Mr Listers on again, off again girlfriend. Although this one is not the original."

"Not the original?" Dex-Starr purred, "What, is she a clone or something."

"No, just from another dimension. Still doesn't eat enough toast though. Oh, look they were trying to patch Holly through to here." Talky toaster floated over to a computer with a number of wires hanging from it. "This shouldn't take long."

"You're an engineer, of sorts, go and help him." Dex-Starr turned to Red Floof to see her posing in front of a full-length mirror I the door of a locker. Red light still crackling down her body as her outfit changed; Gone was her baggy, oversized hoody which had been replaced with a tight, front lacing bask, her wings protruding from made to measure holes, her jogging bottoms had been replaced with a very short mini skirt, her tail poking out from underneath, fish net tights filling in the gap left between the skirt and leather, knee high, high heeled boots, the only part of her original clothing that remained was the strange metallic plate that was strapped between her wings.

"Very practical." Dex-Starr said, sarcasm dripping from his voice. "Hay toaster, how long is this going to last for. I hate to say it but I think she'd be more use the way she was."

"Depends on how fill the Emohawk was, we just need to let the rogue emotion burn out, although I could use a hand, literally and figuratively." The Toaster floated over to Red Floof, "I'm not much of an expert on human fashion but I think you'd turn Mr Lister's head, although the outfits not much for eating toast in, the crumbs would get everywhere. I could do with your delicate touch if you don't mind."

Red Floof followed the Toaster across the room, as they passed Dex-Starr he whispered, "You just have to play to their ego." With a growl Red Floof brought her fist down on the toasters grill, the yellow light flickering as the ring moved in its housing. Laughing Dex-Starr said "Remember, she's still fuelled by anger. Carful though Floof, his ring's not a perrrfect fit." Red Floof just sighed.

It took around half an hour of repair before the big screen on the wall opposite the stasis booth started to flicker to life, then the images of different faces flickered on the screen, one replacing the other at such a speed that no one could make out any detail. The rotation started to slow down and it became evident to the three watchers that there were three different faces; a balding, middle aged man, a woman with long, blond hair and a bald, dark skinned man with a slight moustache. The faces stopped flickering at the dark man.

"That's not what I imagined a 'Holly' to look like." Red Floof muttered.

"That's because I'm not Holly, I'm Queeg 500 the Red Dwarf back up computer." The face said in a stern voice.

"Only you're not," The Toaster said. "Queeg was never real. You're just a projection from Holly, created as an April fool joke."

"Oh god, this is a ship of idiots." Dex-Starr mumbled.

"I started as a joke but Holly saw that I could be useful so he kept my personality backed up. When the Polymorphs started to take over he initiated me and I took control of the ship to try to get the crew to safety."

"Well you don't seem to have do much of a good job, Mr Queen. You're down four crew members." Red Floof said, running a finger down the screen.

"It's Queeg, and I sent the rest of the crew off ship, my plan was to detonate the engines but a Polymorph damaged my uplink to the ship."

"Either way, you still failed." Dex-Starr hissed.

"Say's the people sharing a room with a Polymorph." Queeg sneered

"There's no Polymorph here." Dex-Starr said.

"Turn around kitty cat."

Dex-Starr turned around at Queegs request and watched as the broken door on the empty stasis booth began to fold in on itself, turning into a spring the fired itself in the direction of the hovering cat. Dex-Starr dodged and the spring changed into a hawk, its talons slashing the bag on his back scattering the rings everywhere. Talky Toaster lashed out with one of his yellow tentacles grabbing the polymorph around its neck, before it was able to change shape the toaster dragged it towards his toasting slots where sharp, yellow teeth manifested and bit the polymorphs head off.

"Well maybe you three aren't as useless as you look." Queeg said.

The Toasters leaver clicked and the polymorphs head shot out of the slot, smoke rising of it.


	8. Chapter 8 - To the Tank

Chapter 8 - To the Tank

While Dex-Starr and Red Floof collected the rings that had fallen out of the bag, Talky Toaster and Queeg had discussed what to do next. Having tuned out most of the conversation Red Floof jumped when three small three fingered claws on wheeled bases rolled into the room.

"I have tracked the Cats life signs down to floor thirteen, the floor hasn't been open for a few years and there could be anything down there. I will send the three remaining Scutters with you, Bob will lead as I don't trust any of you to be able to find your way out of an open lift." As Queeg mentioned its name one of the Scutters gave a stiff salute to Dex-Starrs Team, "I will keep in contact for as long as possible. However, floor thirteen is shielded against external communications and is totally self-sufficient. This is probably why the Cat went down there but may also be where the Polymorphs were hiding during their time on board."

"Great." Muttered Red Floof.

Lead by the Scutters the group made their way back down the corridor which was now lit with bright white lights, occasionally they passed a screen in the wall on which Queegs head bobbed up and down as the computer concentrated on getting the ship running again. Entering another lift, Bob the Scutter unlocked a panel, uncovering the button for floor thirteen and the lift began a slow decent.

"Why is this floor locked off?" Red Floof had felt that she needed to say something to break the oppressive silence.

"Floor thirteen, or the Tank as its also known is the ships prison." The Toaster chirped.

"Prison" Red Floof and Dex-Starr responded in unison.

"Red Dwarf travelled between mining planets which means that it's in space for months or, occasionally, years at a time. Couple that with the fact that half the crew are trying to get away from something and you are bound to get a few incidents. "

"Just great." Red Floof muttered.

"Oh, there is nothing to worry about." The Toaster continued. "Most of the crew were wiped out again, this time by a virus that started here in the tank."

"Again, this time. How does a crew get wiped out twice? What kind of ship loses TWO crew's" Red Floof asked?

"We didn't lose two crews, we lost the same crew twice. The crew was originally wiped out when a drive plate failed, filling most of the ship with radiation. Only Lister survived that time as he was in suspended animation for smuggling a cat on board. It took three million years for the radiation levels to become safe, this is where the Felin Sapian race evolved from and why Holly or Queeg as he's calling himself has gone a bit made, he was running all that time, trying to keep the ship out of the way of any other humans whilst it was still radioactive. Later the ship was broken down and rebuilt by some Nano-bots who re-created the crew as well. A virus was brought on board that began to eat away at everything. Lister and the others found a cure but not until more than half the crew were wiped out, Rimmer was lost in a mirror dimension and the rest of the crew evacuated. We found Kochanski crashed on an asteroid and brought her back and Holly re activated Rimmer from his original program." The Toaster stopped.

"I was right, this place is a mad house." Growled Dex-Starr.

The lift opened onto a large open room with a desk at the far end and one door out, seats ran across both of the side walls and a metal grated gantry ran around the wall about half way between the floor and the celling, presumably, Red Floof thought, for guards to patrol. The door behind the desk was locked but, as they approached, Bob the Scutter pointed a key fob at the lock and, with a large click the door swung open to reveal a long straight corridor with a number of indentations for guards to stand. The corridor opened onto a large cylindrical chamber with a platform running around a large drop in the centre of which was a lift. Bob activated a control panel and a pathway form, leading to the lift. As the group descended, past the office blocks and into the cells a device held by another Scutter began to chime. Red Floof wrinkled her nose as the door opened and she was hit with a sharp, acrid smell.

Neon lights flickered causing the shadows to move with a life of their own and the only noises were the whirring of the Scutters motors and the bleep of the tracker. Red Floof's ear twitched as one of the Scutters passed through one of the shadows, just for a second it seemed as if its motor stopped, then the little robot came back into sight.

"Why do the walls look so corroded?" Dex-Starr's question rang through the silence.

"The virus that drove the crew away also affected the ship. No need to worry though, Lister and the others brought the mirror virus back and released it. Both viruses cancelled each other out." The Toaster said in an annoyingly cheery voice.

"Great" Muttered Dex-Starr.


	9. Chapter 9 - Cat

Chapter 9 - Cat

The Shape moved at the end of the corridor, although it was mainly in shadow the small group could see that it seemed to be human, stood at around seven foot and, judging from its chest was most defiantly female.

"Is that the Cat?" Red Floof asked.

"Most defiantly not." Replied the Toaster.

"One of the prisoners?" Asked Dex-Starr.

"Not one that matches the records."

"So, it's another Polymorph." Said Red Floof.

"Seems likely." Agreed the Toaster.

Everyone was silent for a few minutes.

"So, what's it doing?" Asked Red Floof.

"Hunting, probably for the Cat in that form." Answer the Toaster.

"Cheap Harlot." Mumbled Red Floof.

The Polymorph suddenly raised its head as if it was listening to something then strode off down the corridor, keeping their distance, the group of Lanterns and Scutters followed.

The female polymorph met up with two others and emitted a strange screeching sound. As the three polymorphs began to look around one of the Scutters moved, knocking Talky Toaster out of the shadows. Two of the Polymorphs turned and ran towards the group, the female polymorph hesitated for just a second before joining the others. With their attention on the approaching trio of monsters, no one noticed the dark shape bolt out of the cell and down the corridor. The first of the three Polymorphs to reach Talky Toaster dashed forward and tried to grab him with pincer like claws, at the last second Talky rose into the air out of reach, the Polymorph began stretching up towards him. The second Polymorph joined its companion, it too started to stretch upwards and then it stopped, its torso turned in a seemingly unnatural way and its arm turned into a tentacle which lashed out into the shadows. Something moved in the bag on Dex-Starrs back with such a force it pulled the small cat out of the way of the tentacle. Tring to maintain control of himself, Dex-Starr fought against the movement in the bag whilst trying to avoid the tentacles whipping towards him. Red Floof rolled out of the shadows, the red light of her ring manifest into claws and slashed at the tentacle Polymorphs knees the, ignoring it's cry of anger and pain she carried on, slicing at the elongated Polymorphs stomach. The long Polymorph turned its attention from the toaster to Red Floof contorting its form to focus on its attacker as she tried to move out of its way.

A tentacle wrapped it's self around Dex-Starr as something inside the bag pushed from inside, the Polymorph raised the cat towards its feeding tube when two pieces of toast, made from yellow light, each with a mouth filled with sharp teeth in the centre of the top of the bread flew at the tentacle. The Polymorph yelled in pain as the toast bit down and dropped Dex-Starr how fell to the ground. A ring pushed its way from the bag and flew down the corridor.

"I knew you'd want some toast at some time." The Toaster shouted.

The third Polymorph, still in female form stood and watched its companions struggle with the newcomers until it saw the small ring fly out of the bag on the small furry creatures back, as it shot passed her, she turned and followed it down the corridor.

The Cat had been hiding on floor thirteen for three days but had finally been cornered by three Polymorphs, the only reason they hadn't fed on him was, as far as he could tell, that they were fighting over him. As far as he knew there was no one else left on board the ship so, when he saw the Polymorphs turn their attention away from him, he was a bit surprised and, he had to admit, a bit annoyed, after all what could be more interesting than himself. His annoyance passed as soon as he saw what appeared to be Talky Toaster, glowing yellow and floating in the air with a number of tentacles protruding from under him. Cat's surprise grew as two other people joined the Toaster in his fight against the Polymorphs. Sensing his only chance, he bolted form the cell he'd been hiding in and raced down the corridor. Looking behind him, he saw the figure of a seven-foot-tall, very attractive woman strolling towards him.

"Please don't run, I only want to talk."

Her voice was soft and sweet and she seemed to put some swing into her hips as she moved, the Cat hesitated for a second and this was the only thing that stopped him from colliding with another Polymorph as it came out of one of the nearby cells. Upon seeing the Cat, the new Polymorph started to change shape.

"Hay bud, pay no attention to her, you know it's me you want." The creature said settling into its new form, and exact copy of the Cat. Stunned the Cat stopped and looked from the female to the copy of himself then back to the female. The he noticed that there was something else in the corridor, something small, hanging in the air between the female and himself. The Polymorph version of the Cat moved closer then stopped as the small floating thing lit up in a sapphire pink light.

"The life form known only as Cat. You know great love for yourself and you try to share this love, even if it's not understood. Welcome to the Star Sapphires."

With this the small ring shot forward and onto the Cat's figure, sensing that something was happening to its prey the Cat Polymorph moved forward, only to be knocked back as a large, pink crystal surrounded the real Cat. The two Polymorphs started circling the crystal, stalking each other as much as their prey.

Pink light flashed down the corridor.

"Great, what was that?" Dex-Starr growled as he pulled himself from the damaged tentacle.

"No Idea and no time to worry about it." Hissed Red Floof as she slashed at the Polymorph as it began to take on the form of one of her many bullies from before she was changed.

"Warning anger levels rising." Her ring chirped.

The bully polymorph jumped at Red Floof, only to be knocked back by to yellow light, spiked covered bagels. Red Floof span around and slashed with red light claws at the other polymorph which was now in the form of a young woman with dark hair, Dex-Starr seemed unable to take any action against the monster, Red Floof moved to strike the monster but the second Polymorph formed a thick, wooden branch to block her, her red claws jamming in the new appendage.

"I don't know who you think she is but it's not her. Remember, it's a Polymorph." She shouted.

Dex-Starr looked up, puzzled.

"She's an imposter." Red Floof hissed as she cancelled her claws and formed a quarterstaff to counter a blow from the other creature, her tail and wings twitching to maintain her balance.

"Anger levels critical." Dex-Starr's ring chimed as a red light flowed over the small cat's body, solidifying into a red, spiked armour. The Polymorph grew as Dex-Starr leapt but the force of the animal's impact knocked it backwards and it found itself pinned to the ground as the spikes from the armour started to extend outwards.

The Female polymorph stopped as a piece of the pink crystal disappeared leaving a small hole. As it watched more holes began to appear and, not wanting its rival to notice the failing crystal, it placed its feeding tube against the biggest hole. The taste of unabated love filled the monsters mouth at such a rate it had to stop or be overwhelmed, as it pulled back the polymorph heard the growl of its rival which was changing and growing, raising itself above the female, its arms and hands forming insect like blades and its legs bending, readying itself to pounce. The female thought quick and morphed its hand into a bone knife then, in one swift movement it stretched its arm out, the blade piercing the stomach of the other creature. Changing the blade back to a hand the female pushed up through the other polymorphs body until she found its heart which she held onto as she retracted her arm, pulling it back to normal human size.

The Cat stumbled as he became free from the crystal just in time to see a large, insect like monster fall at the feet of tall woman, as he tried to stand the woman turned to him, green blood covering one arm which seemed to be holding a gigantic heart. As she advanced, the woman's face seemed to split open and the feeding tube of a polymorph lashed out. Placing one foot on the prone Cat's groin the polymorph reached down, the feeding tube hovered just above his forehead then stopped and retracted. Reaching down with her free hand, the polymorph grabbed the collar of the Cats waste coat and, stepping back she lifted him to his feet and leaned in so her mouth was next to his ear.

"You taste better than anything I've had in a long time." The polymorphs voice was low and soft. "I think that, even without that ring you have enough love to keep me happy for a long time. Keep me fed and I'll help protect you."

The Cat stepped back surprised. "Help me, you're a monster."

"Yes." The polymorph hissed quietly. "But I can be your monster, your Emotion Munching Monstrous Ally. Look I'll even give you a heart. It's not mine but don't you say 'It's the thought that counts'?" The Polymorph offered Cat the heart she had ripped out of the other monster. "I took it for you." The Cat took more steps back and raised his ring, pink light cracked around his hand. The Polymorphs face fell and tears welled up.

"If you don't want the heart then what can I do? Is it my form? I thought you'd like it; I took it from your mind. I can do others, anything you want."

The Polymorph began to change form, first to the Cat then to cycle through other female shapes, she stopped when a cry rang out from around the corner.

"At least let me prove my worth, your friends need our help."

"They're not my friends, well maybe one. I've never seen the others before." The Cat said

"So you want to let them die?" The Polymorph asked.

"Well no." Answered the Cat.

"Come on then." The Polymorph ran towards the sounds of the battle.

The two polymorphs were standing back to back, both now a nightmare of tentacles bone and teeth. The toaster had been caught in crab like claw which was holding the toast release lever down, a tentacle had rapped itself around Dex-Starr's tail, swinging him around and keeping his mouth away from the monstrosity's main bulk. A barrage of tentacles were assaulting Red Floof who was holding them at bay with claws and quarterstaff. A Tentacle swinging around her back was suddenly vaporised in blast of pink light but the continuing barrage form the other tentacles made it impossible for Red Floof to pay any attention to what where the blast had come from. The claw holding the toaster exploded in the same light and the Toaster floated up and fired two yellow bagels at the tentacle holding Dex-Starr, the bagels exploded on contact and Dex-Starr flipped as he hit the ground, turning around and spraying red plasma over the closest Polymorph. A woman in short, tight, overly sexy guards uniform ran past Red Floof and started stabbing one the Polymorphs with a baton with a sharpened end, any tentacles that came near her were blasted away by the pink light.

Seeing her chance, Red Floof pounced forward and using her wings to carry her headed for the head of one of the monsters. As she got close, she changed her polearm to an axe and swung with all her might. The axe sliced through the monster with an ease that took Red Floof by surprise and, carried by the unexpected momentum she crashed into the opposite wall.

The now headless Polymorph fell to the ground and the unknown woman looked around and drove the baton into the creature's head. "Blast the body." She shouted over her shoulder, and a well-groomed, dark skinned man stepped forward and fired a ray of pink light at the body, blasting it to pieces.

Dex-Starr tore at the wounds inflicted on the other polymorph, his red-light claws covered with the monster's blood, Talky Toaster flew overhead and emptied his crumb tray, spilling yellow crumbs over the polymorph, as each crumb hit it exploded, taking chunks of the creature with it. As the creature fell it was met with a barrage of red, pink and yellow attacks that reduced it to mush.

"Impressive weapons. I imagine they could be a problem in the wrong hands." The woman said, reaching out to stroke Dex-Starr.

"There are plenty of safeguards to make sure that doesn't happen." Dex-Starr Purred.

"Err Cat who is this." Talky asked floating over to the woman.

"This is er, Emoton… Emotional..Err…" The Cat stammered

"I'm Emma, I was a guard in the tank before the virus hit and got stuck down here when the quarantine sealed it up." The female Polymorph said in a soft, soothing voice.

"I'll be having words with Queeg to check what you say." Said the Toaster. "In the mean time we need to find out where all these creatures are coming from."

"Oh, I can help there. There's a nest spread over the lower cells. From what I saw most of the Polymorphs left not long after the ship stopped. Out of what remained I saw three queens, they would be the most dangerous. We just killed two and the third." Emma paused, "The third has been taken care of."

"What's that supposed to mean." Snapped the Toaster.

"She killed it." The Cat said. "Whilst I was in the crystal thingy from the ring. The Queen was trying to get to me and Emma snuck up on it and killed it."

"Yes, the queen was distracted by what it thought was helpless prey leaving itself defenceless from behind. Its body is just around that corner. Which is the way to the nest, if you want to see it."

With a nod the group started down the corridor.


	10. Chapter 10 - The Nest

Chapter 10 – The Nest

"What did he mean about being in a crystal?" Red Floof asked Dex-Starr, "Nothing like that happened to me when I got my ring."

"There are seven major powers on the emotional spectrum; anger, greed, fear, will, hope, compassion & love and at either end of the spectrum is life and death. The Guardians created the first power ring which was later improved and became the Green lantern ring, representing will power. From there others took the ring and bent it to their own will. The yellow ring that the flying appliance has was created by an exiled Green lantern known as Sinestro who managed to corrupt a flaw in his ring and turn it to fear."

"Wait, Wait." The Cat interrupted Dex-Starr. "Are you telling me a band of superhero's had a member called Sinestro and they didn't expect him to betray them? And people say I'm dumb."

Ignoring the remark Dex-Starr continued "The Star Sapphires were a love cult, as far as I can tell and they used the power of crystals to make the sapphire power ring. As a side effect, a new wearer is temporarily encased in crystal as their body is adjusted to the ring. They don't lose their hearts, like we do but some do lose their mind. However, I don't think that would affect this creature much." Dex-Starr sneered at the Cat.

Led by Emma, the party moved through the corridors to a service elevator which took them deeper than even the Cat had been before. There were no corridors on this level, just vast open rooms lined with shelves of food and other supplies and the yellow, red or pink lights around those that had rings grew brighter to help keep them warm. They passed through three store rooms until they came to a room that had lost most of its floor, a hole in the wall had been patched up with an air tight foam that had hardened to seal a hole to the outside.

"What's down there?" Dex-Starr asked, floating close to the hole.

"Water storage tanks. They run along the bottom of the ship to give easy access when they need to be filled." Emma explained.

"You seem very knowable for a guard." Talky said accusingly.

"I was trapped down here a long time so I did a bit of exploring." Emma said. "The nest is in the next room but I don't think we'll have much trouble. Anything healthy left. Apart from the ones after the Cat here, and the woman in the box."

Skirting around the hole, the group made their way across the store room, the door at the far end was slowly opening and closing, a brown, sticky substance was creeping through the door, stopping it from closing. The room beyond was dark and cold and the main source of light was a large screen halfway along the wall that was filled with the flickering black and white of static. The same brown substance that was blocking the door ran up and down the walls and along the floor and thousands of egg sacks seemed to be growing out of it. Most of the eggs were empty.

The next two rooms were the same but the screen in the third was off. Red Floof played with the controls for a few minutes before the Cat moved next to her, the screen came to life as he hit it filling the room with a cold white light. A pitiful whine came from around them and shapes wriggled and crawled along the floor. Emma brought her foot down on something and then bent down.

"The new born, they hatched but there was no food around so they are starving to death. They haven't yet learned to hibernate." Emma said holding a small slug like thing in the air. Talky went to say something when the image of Queeg filled the screen.

"What are you fools doing skulking around the storage deck? I said to get the cat then return to the upper deck." Queeg demanded.

"We found a nest. We were checking to see if there were any more Polymorphs down here." Talky answered.

"And what were you going to do if you found any? Offer them some toast." Queeg Snapped.

"It's worked so far." The Toaster retorted.

"All right. You scutteres get some flamethrowers and clear this mess out. The rest of you report up top, I've got a fix on Kryten." Queeg ordered. "Wait, who's that?"

"This is Emma." Cat said.

"She claims to be a guard who got locked down here." Interrupted the Toaster.

"She's with me." Said the Cat.

"Just get up here." Shouted Queeg.

The group headed back towards the flight deck and the shutters headed towards the store room to get the flamethrowers, Queen was waiting for them.

"Time to head out people, I have a fix on Kryten


	11. Chapter 11 - Kryten

Chapter 11 – Kryten

The group gathered on the flight deck of the Red Dwarf looking at the star chart Queeg was displaying.

"I've manged to narrow down a distress signal to this debris field. However, the signal has now failed so we can assume that things are not going well for Kryten. Hopefully you will be able to find his head and it will be able to tell us what happened to the rest of the crew. I will continue to scan for the missing shuttle craft and will update you if I find anything."

With that Queeg went silent and everyone headed for the nearest airlock. On the way they passed Bob and the other scutters, now armed with flamethrowers, on their way back to the nest. No one noticed that one of the Scutters was missing.

A locker outside the airlock provided Emma with a space suit, a Flame thrower and a heavy-duty explosive launcher that was used for mining called a Bazookoid. Talky Toaster floated around in an agitated state as Emma Suited up.

"I still don't understand why we need to arm that thing." He said as he buzzed around Emma.

"How else is she going to help, we all have power rings but she won't be able to defend herself if we're attacked by Polymorphs." Replied Red Flood.

"She IS a Polymorph." Snapped the Toaster.

"Maybe, Maybe not. All I know is that she has not threatened us and has helped us. Anyway, if she does turn out to be a Polymorph, I think that the four of us can handle her." Red Floof said

"Why can I never find any one competent, or who wants toast." Muttered the Toaster.

"I'm ready, Thanks for waiting." Chirped Emma, picking up the two weapons with no effort.

"Yes, we can handle her no problem." Talky muttered to himself.

Emma pushed the open button on the airlock and coloured lights surrounded the rest of the group as they activated their power rings and flew towards the distress signal, Emma fired up her jet pack and followed.

The debris field looked as if a small moon had recently exploded and the resulting rocks hadn't had much time to disperse, something was flying through the rubble.

"So, what is it?" The Cat asked

"It looks like some kind of alien craft." The Toaster answered

"So not a polymorph." The Cat said

"It's hard to tell, they can look like anything but I can't tell what it's doing if it was a Polymorph." The Toaster said

"Thank Cloister, I've had enough of those things." The Cat said, Emma coughed and the Toaster sniggered.

The group watched as the alien ship flew in and out of the rubble. The craft swooped suddenly towards one of the rocks, flew briefly along the surface and rose back into the air bringing it into sharp focus.

"Oh, hell no, it's a bloody Brianiac ship." Red Floof cried, red light crackling around her as she flew after it.

"What's got her panty's in twist?" Talky asked

"What's a Braniac?" Asked The Cat

Dex-Starr sighed, "Braniac is an artificial or semi artificial lifeform, no one is sure which. He is a collector, an invader and is always looking for ways to improve himself. Not too long ago a man from a future called Lex Luthor travelled back to the present, in his time line Braniac had invaded earth and stolen the superpowers from a number of individuals. Lex Luthor stole a number of nano bots, called exobits, which contained these powers and released them in the present in an attempt to change his future. The current Braniac found out and attacked earth in an attempt to get the Exobite information early."

"So, whys the kitty girl so annoyed?" The Cat asked

"Red Floof was human, she was transformed into that happy ball of fur by the Exobits then captured by Braniac in his attempt to extract the information from her. Unfortunately, or, I suppose fortunate there was a power ring in Braniacs ship which picked up on her mood, apparently she was already having a bad day when Braniac picked her up, so she ended up in the red lantern corp."

"And now she's smashing a large number of those Braniac ships apart. Should we help her?" Emma asked.

"Probably best to wait till she's finished, she may not see that it's us." Dex-Starr purred

The group watched as Red Floof, who was not much more that a blur of red light dashed between the drones that had come to help the first one, smashing them to pieces and didn't approach until the las drone was pounded into a pile of rubble on the nearest rock. As they landed Red Floof kicked the remains of a drone sending a strange, flesh coloured hand flying across the surface of the rock, the hand shook itself, stood up on its fingers and began to move around blindly bumping into rocks. Cat moved forward and scooped the hand up.

"Hay I remember this. Kryten did this before but last time he'd stuck an eye on one of the figures. Everyone thought it was a tarantula."

The hand clicked its fingers and began to point to another part of the moon.

"What is it, boy? You know where the rest of you is?" The cat asked. The hand just continued pointing.

Using the hand as a compass the group flew through the debris field until they came to a small rock, a large Braniac drone was moving over ground looking for something, before it had time to react to the new comers it was hit by two yellow bagel bombs, Red Floofs mace and Dex-Starr's plasma vomit all of which reduced the drone to scrap metal. As the dust settled everyone saw a head which looked as if it had been carved out of the same material as the hand by a large chisel.

"Ah, thank you sirs and lady's I really thought I was a goner there. Mr Cat sir, Mr Toaster is that you?"

"Yes an' we got help buddy." The Cat said

The hand jumped out of The Cats hand and scuttled over to the head. Dex-Starr landed nearby and a ring shot out of the bag on his back.

"Kryten you have dedicated your life to serving others and caring for your charges even beyond death. Welcome to the Indigo Tribe."

The ring flew to the disembodied hand which allowed it onto its finger, tendrils of indigo light streamed from the wrist of the hand and the bottom of Krytens head and shot out across the broken fragments of the moon.

"What's it doing?" Cat asked

"I don't know what it's supposed to be doing but it's brought us company." Emma said, pointing to a number of Braniac drones that were approaching their position. Weapons formed and everyone rose into the air to meet the oncoming attack. From where Krytens head sat the sky was a rainbow of colours as ring weapons met laser fire.

Talky Toaster bobbed down as Emma fired the bazookoid, a drone exploded behind him. A drone engaged with Red Floof was suddenly knocked out of the way as a streak of indigo light rushed past pulling a leg behind it. More of the indigo tendrils were returning, each dragging parts of Kryten with them, as the final part reach the head a blast of indigo light flashed from the power ring fusing all the parts back together.

Emma was cornered between two Braniac drones, a spark shot form the flame thrower which then died, trying again the weapon managed a small, quick stream of flame before dying. Casting the gun aside and letting it float away she switched to the Bazookiod blasting one of the drones away. The second drone moved in and reached out for her before she had time to reload, as the machine went to grab her a wooden pole smashed through its domed top. The drone sparked and went limp and the staff pulled itself out of the dead drone, flying back to the mechaniond who was floating, surrounded in an indigo light. Emma was sure that the other end of the staff had a mop head on it.

"Thanks for the save." She said

"I'm here to serve. By the way I am Kryten. Please follow me."

Surprised that they could hear each other with no atmosphere Emma followed Kryten down the surface of the nearest chunk of moon, where the rest of the group were already gathering.


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

"Toaster to Queeg, Toaster to Queeg, do you copy."

"Queeg to toaster I copy, Over."

"Toaster to Queeg, do you want some toast?"

"Cut it out and get on with your report."

"Ok, ok no need to get grouchy. I'm a toaster, I'm meant to toast."

"Get on with it Toaster."

"Toaster to Queeg. We have Kryten. He'd gone to pieces but he seems to have pulled himself back together, over."

"Queeg to Toaster, Any trouble, over?"

"Toaster to Queeg, we ran into some natives of this universe but we've dealt with then. Kryten now has a ring of his own. Requesting any information on the whereabouts of Rimmer or Lister, over.

"Queeg to Toaster. I have their location. They are both together. They are…." Static hissed through the intercom then it went silent.


	13. Chapter 13 - Back in the Red

Chapter 13 – Back in the Red

The lights flickered in the cargo bay making Bob Scutter miss his aim. Nothing happened for a second, the lights remaining as bright as before. Bob re-activated his flame thrower and took aim at another cluster of eggs. As he started to fire the lights flickered again and the large wall screens went blank. Bob looked around, the other two Scutters were contently carrying out their mission, burning away any signs of the polymorph nest without any concern for the environment around them.

Bob studied the other two units, their model numbers showed that they had been recently brought out of storage. The Red Dwarf had a large contingency of Scutter units and had always carried a few spares in case a unit was damaged on a mining operation, as the ship had been traveling through space for three million years some of the units had broken down or become senile and had recently been replaced. Bob, himself had gained a small amount of autonomy and personality over the years but had never been deemed to be damaged or a danger so he had been left running. Bob also knew that this was complete and utter smeg as this version of Red Dwarf was only a few years old as it had been recreated, along with everything on it by Kryten's Nantes. This, of course, meant that Bob had been created senile. Bob didn't care, he picked up the flame thrower again and pointed it at the eggs and then he stopped, two other units were burning the nest but his log showed that there should be three. He thought about what to do. The lights went out.

"I don't understand, he was there on minute and gone the next." Talky said

"Maybe something has blocked the signal. One of these rocks or a bit of robot." Dex-Starr said

"Try jiggling the aerial." Cat suggested.

"There is nothing wrong with the signal. We are still connected the ship. It's Queeg, he's just not there." The Toaster snapped.

"Maybe he's gone for toast." Emma quipped.

"He'd better not have. Not without me." Talky said

"Stop." Red Floof interrupted. "If we are going to find your friends we need to work together." The rest of the group looked at the woman. "Now, what is the worst if we can't get back in touch with the ship?"

"If we can't get in touch with Red Dwarf then we have no way of tracking the others." The Toaster said.

"That's not entirely true sir." Kryten said. "Mr Lister, Mr Rimmer and myself had been trapped in a cave when we picked up life nearby. I used the matter paddle to jump as close as I could to the signals."

"So we can get your last co-ordinates from the matter paddle." The toaster finished.

"Possibly." Replied Kryten.

"What do you mean, possibly?" asked the Toaster

"Possibly." Repeated Kryten holding up the broken matter paddle.

Bob rolled along a corridor towards the control deck when he came across the remains of a Scutter. Checking his records, he could see that this was the way they had first come in search of the Cat. The damaged Scutter unit had been ripped in two and, when he checked its data log Bob could see that it had stopped working before they had found the Cat. Checking his log again, Bob could see that all four units had been present when they had fought the three Polymorphs and that the battle had been started sooner than the party would have liked when one of the scutters had forced Talky Toaster out into the open. If he had had a heart then it would be filled with a sinking feeling, Bob check the flame thrower and headed to the control deck at his top speed.

The room was a mess, smoke was wafting from every console, emergency lights flashed, Queegs image blinked in and of life and a chair was bobbing up and down. A Polymorph was hunched over one of the computer panels, its bottom half was still the square, blue base of a Scutter but its top half was a number of fleshy arms and eye-stalks. The arms were busy ripping the wires out of the control panel. Bob moved forward and lowered the flamethrower at the Polymorph, a jet of gas hissed form the weapon but failed to ignite. He pulled the trigger again and the gas caught but too late, the polymorph grew a disk of asbestos out of its back which absorbed the flame. Without turning tentacles barbed with bone shot towards the lone Scutter. Bob dogged all but one of the flailing appendages and was knocked in to the stasis booth. Tentacles crashed into the booth as the polymorph tried to hit him whilst continuing its destruction of the control panel and the stasis booth hissed as Bob moved away from it.

Something moved under the table.

Bob drew the flame thrower up and fired at the polymorph, flames danced around the creature for a few seconds then cut out, the fuel tank empty. Burnt and angry the polymorph turned its full attention on Bob sending tentacles of flesh, bone and chain in his direction, the scutter used the dead flamethrower as a club to beat the tentacles away but the polymorph grabbed the weapon out of the scutters claw and wrapped a chain around its base.

Something clinked. Something slid. Something hit a chair leg. Both Bob and the polymorph watched as a small, dull ring slid from under the desk. Both waited for the ring to do something, both expected it to rise into the air, to say something and to attach itself to someone. Both expected that someone to be Bob. Nothing happened. The polymorph made a sound like laughter and tightened its grip on the little scutter. As its chain tentacle began to crush Bob the table shot into the air, a second ring was hovering and glowing red. The Scutter and the Polymorph watch as the ring hovered, both wondering why it wasn't moving. In the silence a low, almost inaudible his caught Bob's attention, he turned his claw slowly, so as not to attract the Polymorphs attention, until he could find the source of the sound. A faint mist was seeping from one of the stasis booths, the booth, Bob realised, that contained Kristine Kochanski. Moving as fast as he could, Bob made a dash for the stasis booths control panel, the Polymorph tried to cut him off but the red ring crashed into it, the weight of all the tentacles it had formed unbalanced the creature. The ring came to a stop in front of the stasis booth's door as Bob tapped furiously at the emergency release button. The sound of stretching flesh and snapping bone came from behind Bob as the Polymorph grew and stretched, filling half the room. The Stasis booth hissed and Kristine Kochanski staggered out, the red ring forced itself onto her finger even before her eyes were open, she opened her eyes and screamed as she saw the monstrosity in front of her but, as well as the sound, a constant stream of red hot plasma shot from her mouth covering the control panel, the floor and the polymorph, Bob hid under the chair that had remained upright. The room was filled with noise, Kochanski's scream, the polymorph as it howled with pain and the computer console as it fizzed and sparked from the damage inflicted on it. The there was a thud, the Polymorph collapsed from the plasma burns, seeing the monster fall Kochanski stopped screaming stopping the flow of plasma, everything went silent.

"Kristine Kochanski, you are angry; angry about being ripped from your own universe, angry about being stuck with an incompetent version of the man you loved, angry about the death of humanity. Welcome to the red lantern corps."

The soft, almost mechanical voice of the ring broke the spell of silence, snapping Kochanski back to her senses.

"What the Smeg is going on." She screamed as she looked around the room. A soft tapping caught her attention and she saw a scutter writing something on the floor.

_Polymorph infestation,_

_Holly hopped to find help_

_Lister & Rimmer taken_

_Kryten, Toaster, Cat & Friendly Ploymorph with natives to find them._

"Great, how are those idiots going find anyone. Who the smeg even teams up with a polymorph? Do we have any way finding them?" Kochanski asked

"Locating any other active ring's" her ring chimed

"Can you do anything about this?" Kochanski asked Bob, the Scutter nodded his claw.

"Ring signal found… Ring signal lost. Relocating….. I have a fix on the other ring users Red Floof & Dex-Starr. Information states they are with Sapphire Cat, Indigo Kryten, Yellow Talky Talky Toaster."

Kochanski raised her hand, "Then lead the way."


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14

"Done." Red Floof held the matter paddle aloft, "Or, at least it's fixed enough to get us to where we're going and possibly back again."

"It can get us back to Mr Lister and Mr Rimmer?" Kryten asked.

"No, it can get us back the last co-ordinates it teleported from, so where you left them. If they've moved it won't take us to where ever they are." Red Floof said.

"Well that's better than nothing and I doubt that they have gone far." Kryten said.

"I am a little worried about the power though, especially if we need to make a quick getaway. Talky, it will only transport your light bee anyway so you'll need to re boot when we get there." The toaster grumbled at Red Floofs instructions, "Dex-Starr, it would be better if someone were to hold you during transport, the less individuals it has to lock onto the better."

"Really, you want someone to hold me." Dex-Starr hissed

Ignoring him, Red Floof Continued. "Emma, can you change to something smaller and maybe let the Cat hold you."

"Of course, my dear." Emma said softly and changed into a small mouse.

"What." Talky spluttered. "I've been trying to warn you all about her, that she's a polymorph and you've all treated me like an idiot."

"That's because we all know she's a polymorph. She's been helpful, she hasn't tried to harm us, at least not since she hooked up with the cat. I don't know if that's anything to do with his ring or if she genuinely does like him but I'm not going to keep harassing her whilst she's helping us." Red Floof said.

"So, you trust her? You're the idiot." Talky shouted

"No, I don't know whether we can trust her and I'm ready to splat her if she even hints at harming any of us but, whilst she's on our side she stays. Now are you ready?" Red Floof grabbed Dex-Starr out of the air and hit a button on the matter paddle, light shot out of the device and surrounded the party and the rock they were standing on disappeared. The light from the matter paddle faded and the group found themselves in darkness, the sound of metal on stone rang out as something fell to the ground.

"Just a minute." Krytens voice rang out of the darkness, two beams of light suddenly shone from the mechaniods eyes, faintly illuminating the cave they were in. A faint yellow glow came from the ground where the light bee containing Talky Toaster lay.

"Just a sec." Red Floof picked up the light bee and pushed the ring back in, yellow light flickered.

"Howdi Do dily do. Do you want some toast?"

"We're in the middle of cave, we don't know where we are and the only light is coming from his eyes. Why would we even be thinking about toast?" Dex-Starr hissed.

"Everyone needs to eat." The Toaster replied.

The Cat placed a small mouse on the cavern floor, the mouse expanded and stretched until it was roughly human in shape and size.

"Now. Let's see if I can help with the lighting." Small tubes began to grow from various places on Emma, the tip of growth began to glow until the area around her was well lit. Red Floof gently batted on of the growths which swung slowly.

"There are many forms of life that have their own bioluminescence and a Polymorph can create anything that may produce an emotion or help in their survival. In this situation light will produce hope so I can do it." Emma explained.

"Useful." Red Floof said.

"So where are the others?" Cat asked, Kryten and Emma began to shine their lights around the cave which turned out to be much bigger that they had first though, suddenly Red Floof held up her hand.

"Shhh, theres something." She paused her ears twitching as she searched for a sound. "Over there, against the wall."

The lights were shone where Red Floof indicated, nothing was visible at first but, as the group moved closer the hunched figure of a man became visible, he seemed to cradling something in an old, leather deerstalker hat and sobbing, he seemed oblivious to the group's arrival.


	15. Chapter 15 - Flashback

Chapter 15 – Flashback

Everything had gone to smeg. That was the only thing that Dave Lister knew for certain. Red Dwarf, his ship, his home, the last refuge of humanity had suffered a number of incidents over the last three million and something years but it had always been there. Even when it had been reduced to a microscopic size and stolen by Krytens nanites it had been there, in his mind at least. It had become more than a ship, more than a home to Lister, it was a symbol of normality, of survival and now it was overrun with monsters.

Everything had happened so fast, Holly had reported a discrepancy in the food stock, a problem that should have been solved when the ship had been re-built as the nanites had stocked the ship for the resurrected crew. A vast quantity of food was reported to have disappeared and the water tanks were showing a large loss. Scutters had been sent down but none of them had returned so, eventually Listed and Kryten armed themselves with bazookoides and laser cutters and made their way to the storage bay. They made it as far as floor thirteen.

The prison level had been sealed ever since the virus had been stopped and Lister's hand shook as he pressed the door release button. The door hissed, clunked and began to open, it hadn't gotten halfway before something shot through the gap knocking Lister off his feet. Lister's vision was filled with shapes flowing through the still opening doorway. The shapes were so varied in form that is was impossible for him to tell what was going on, some seemed to be flying, some walking and others jumped, something landed on him, it's weight pushing him down but when he looked all he saw was a set of wind up plastic teeth. The teeth sat still for a minute and seemed to stare into him then their winder began to turn with any aid and the teeth chattered off.

"This way Sir, we can make it through the door." A pink, plastic hand reached down and Lister look it, helping himself off the ground.

"Thanks, Kryten. What the Smeg is going on? What are all these things?"

"I'm not sure Sir. It looks like some old junk has come to life. Probably something left down here from the prisoners."

Lister looked a Kryten and was about to speak when a word seemed to float through the air, "Lying…"

"What was that? Kryten did you hear it?" Lister asked.

"Oh, it was probably one of the items, I'm sure I saw a radio amongst them."

"Yeah that makes sense. So, what is it, have we experienced anything like this before?"

Kryten stood and thought for a minute, Lister thought he saw an expression of panic cross the Mechanoids face. Suddenly Kryten grabbed Lister and pulled him to one side, a heard of computer chairs rolled passed nearly knocking to down.

"This way sir. If we keep moving, we can stay out of their way and then make our way back up to the flight deck." Kryten suggested.

"Thanks man, I don't know what I'd have done without you. There's so many of them you know but your giving me hope, that we can sort this out." Lister said

"Well that was the plan _Sir" _The last word seemed more of a sneer but, before Lister could say anything Krytens bottom jaw cracked open and a feeding tube shot from the gap, the last thought that went through Lister head before he passed out was 'Oh Smeg'.

"Kryten to Holly. I've found Mr Lister."

Lister had no idea how long he had been unconscious and it took a few minutes for his mind to catch up. The he remembered the feeding tube, he'd seen one a couple of times and both times it had ended badly. The he saw Kryten, he shuffled back until he hit the wall and he felt for his bazokoid until he remembered that he had dropped it when the creatures, which he now realised were polymorphs, had burst through the door. He had never felt so hopeless.

"Stay away, I know what you are. Your one of them aren't you? A polymorph."

"No sir, it's me, Kryten."

"No, you're not. You're the one that jumped me."

"No sir, I shot that one. Look it's over there."

Lister looked to where Kryten was pointing, the body of Kryten lay there, bleeding in a totally non mechanoid way.

"Then you're another one." Lister said.

"I can assure you sir that I am not a polymorph."

"Ah but that's what a polymorph would say." Lister Said

"That's true Sir. However, a polymorph can only mimic, it cannot know things that happened in your past, like the fact that you finished your curried kippers from last night for breakfast this morning."

"Ok, that true. It's still hopeless though, we're trapped down here and the polymorphs are running all over the ship."

"Well now sir, you are only feeling like that because the polymorph took one of your emotions. I would guess at hope." Kryten said.

"That doesn't make it any less true though, does it?" Lister said.

"No sir but we have been in any number of hopeless situations before. Remember when you were attacked by your own curry?"

"Which time. No, it doesn't matter. Let's get back to the flight deck, we may be doomed but we don't need to stay here."

The trip back to the flight deck was surprisingly un-eventful, all the polymorphs had seemed to have fled the confines of floor thirteen and had spread through the huge ship.

"Hay guys what's happening." The Cat had greeted them as they entered the flight room.

"Yes, where have you been? We've been trying to contact you for over an hour now." Rimmer asked

"We were attacked by polymorphs. I had to temporarily shut myself down so I didn't attract their attention. Mr Lister was not so fortunate. He has lost all hope I'm afraid."

"A polymorph, where did it come from? How did it get on the ship?" Rimmers voice began to shake with fear.

"Not 'a' Polymorph. Lots of polymorphs. There must have been hundreds." Lister said

"Oh don't exaggerate Lister we'd have known about hundreds of anything aboard." Said Rimmer.

"I don't think he's exaggerating." Cat said from the scanners. "I'm getting lots of blips on the internal senses."

"How many?" barked Rimmer

"One hundred, no five hundred, six, seven, nine. There's over a thousand."

"How can we have missed so many of them?" Rimmer asked.

"We stopped monitoring the storage bays some time ago." Kryten said.

"Why would we do that?" asked Rimmer.

"Because we kept picking up space weevils." Answered Kryten.

"Ah, "Said Rimmer. "Well there's nothing for it then we need to try to boot up Holly and get full control of the ship."

It had only taken a couple of hours to put Holly back in the main frame using a backup of his old program that had been hidden in a watch but, by that time Red Dwarf had been overrun by the shape changing creatures. Realising that the only food was the small group of creatures in the flight deck the polymorphs had begun to fill every corridor, walkway and vent around the area, fighting with each other to get closer to the intoxicating taste of fear coming from the small room.

"The Ship is over run and we have no way of knowing where these creatures are, or what they are." Holly said.

"So, we're smegged." Lister said

"No, we just need help." Said Holly

"Which we can't get. We don't even know what happened to the crew." Said Lister

"There is one chance I can think of." Said Holly. "We Holly Hop." As he spoke two scutters placed a box on the desk, the box was a red cube with a yellow label saying 'Holly Hop Drive', on top of the box was an elevated grey area which had a red and a green button on the top. The red button was labelled Stop and the Green Start.

"That old thing." Said Rimmer.

"Yes, this old thing. Look we need help and we won't get here so we hop and we keep hopping until we find a universe with the tech and resources to help us."

"And then what, even if we can find help, we can't get in touch with any one." Said Rimmer

"Yes, we can. I've briefed the toaster on the situation and uploaded his program into one of Rimmer's spare light bees, he can relay the message to anyone who can help."

"Great." Murmured Lister. "Our fate is in the hands of a bread obsessed moron and a box labelled Stop/Start. We are smegged."


	16. Chapter 16 - Orange & Green

Chapter 16 Orange & Green

Lister barely looked up when he heard something clank on the cave floor, the voices didn't even register but the touch light shining on him made him react, he turned a tear streaked face towards the group and screamed.

"Smeg off you bastards. You've killed my best friend, you've destroyed my ship, and you've taken my hope. Look at this, it's broken, you've killed him."

Lister stumbled towards the group waving a light bee at them, Red Floof moved his side and snatched it from his hand.

"Hey look, it's another one of those hologram thingy's. Will this give us another toaster?" She asked.

"No." Lister shouted, "It contains the most honest, loyal man I've ever known and you don't deserve to even hold that."

"Really," Said the Cat, "I thought it would be Rimmer."

"It is Rimmer." Shouted Lister as he jumped forward, trying to grab the light bee. Talky Toaster wrapped a yellow tentacle around him.

"It seems ok but it still needs power. Dex, do you have any rings left? Maybe I can get a reaction, like we did with the toaster." Red Floof asked.

Lister had been subdued by Talky Toaster and Kryten and was currently sitting in the corner sobbing. Kryten was talking to him but none of the others could get close enough to hear what was being said. Dex-Starr rummaged in the little bag.

"Two left." He hissed, batting them over to Red Floof, the first gave no reaction but the second ring sparked as it was held near the light bee. Red Floof moved the ring away and fished the power supply from the light bee, replacing it with the ring. Almost immediately the light bee wrenched itself from Red Floofs hand and floated in the air in front of her.

"That mine, you can't have it." The voice rang out even as the figure appeared, a stern looking man with uncontrollable, mess hair and a metallic H in the middle of his forhead.

"In fact, it's not only mine but it is me." He looked around "There's nothing here."

"Rimmer, is that you?" Lister almost shouted, his voice taking on a strained tone. "I, I can't believe it. They managed to bring you back. But your colours not quit right, you're a bit…" He suddenly doubled over, coughing.

"What's wrong with him?" Cat asked.

"Best guess is that he's found hope, something that should be impossible since the polymorph took it all." Kryten said.

"And what's wrong with him?" Cat asked, pointing at Rimmer whose image had started to flicker.

"I'm not sure about that Sir." Kryten replied.

Suddenly Rimmers imaged faded, his light bee continued to hover. Rimmer's image returned but instead of the H there was a circle, inside the circle was a small one joined to the outer circle by four lines and a triangle at the top whose point was towards the centre of the smaller circle.

"Arnold Judas Rimmer, you feel that you are owed by the universe for all the suffering it has put you through. You believe that you should be able to take what you want as you have been given nothing. Welcome to the Orange lantern corps."

"Great." Dex-Starr groaned. "Orange, he's going to be no use to us."

The walls of the cave started to move, to pulse and bulge, rocks came away and took on other forms until 8 polymorphs stood before the group. Talky Toaster and Dex-Starr formed weapons as the creatures ran towards them. Red Floof created her mace which almost instantly flickered and disappeared.

"Oh smeg, I'm drained. It must have been the fight with the Braniac drones."

"If someone can create a distraction, I think I may be able to help. My ring is telling me I can recharge you." Kryten Said

"A distraction, how about this." Red Floof pulled the metallic disk from between her wings and through it a group of approaching polymorphs, as it neared the disk flipped as two booster jets popped out of the side. Guns unfolded from the underside of the disk and opened fire on the creatures.

"You've had that all this time and have only used it now." Dex-Starr shouted.

"It's got limited power. I was saving it for the right time." Replied Red Floof.

"Mine." Shouted Rimmer as he shot towards the gun bot, a polymorph swung down from the roof and him.

"NO!" Lister ran towards the polymorph that had grabbed Rimmer, punching and kicking the monster. The polymorph snatched Lister up and raised him towards its mouth, Lister ripped a badge from his jacket and rammed it into the creatures feeding tube as it shot towards him. The polymorph dropped Lister who landed with a thud, even with the wind knocked out of him, Lister stood up and raced towards the polymorph that was still carrying Rimmer. The Gun Bot shot at a polymorph that was heading for Lister. Lister jumped as the polymorph shrank back to the cave roof and, with ounce of thought and strength, Lister willed himself to catch the creature. His jump was amazing, the adrenalin pulsing through his body mixed with the slightly lower gravity but, just as his hand was about to grab the polymorph it disappeared into the shadows, still Lister tried, throwing himself forward. It wasn't enough and, with a cry of desperation he found himself falling again, as he fell something tugged at his finger and the last of Dex-Starr's ring found its new wearer.

"David Lister, you have survived as the last human through your own will, you have forced out a lack of Hope and strive to save your friend, welcome to the Green lanterns."


	17. Chapter 17 - The Final Battle

Chapter 17 – The Final Battle.

The Scutters finished burning away the smallest parts of the polymorph nest but found that it was so extensive that, if they burnt it where it was, they risked a fire that would engulf Red Dwarf. As they pulled a particularly stubborn part of the nest away a body fell towards them and, as they moved the body three starving baby polymorphs fell from it. Seeing the scutters the baby's tried to feed but the scutters had no emotion circuits and they were unharmed. The Scutters rounded up and burned the baby's and then continued with the destruction of the nest, they came across six other body's, all prisoners who had been held on deck thirteen and had been used by the polymorphs as the first incubators for their baby's. There was evidence that, after the prisoners, other polymorphs had been used for breeding. None of this mattered to the scutters who continued with the destruction of the nest.

Red Floof, Dex-Starr and the Dwarfers were outnumbered, weapons of different colours flashed but the polymorphs just changed shape to cope with them. The gun bot encountered the same problem, it had managed to take out a few of the monsters but then they had realised what was happening and adapted their forms to cope with the new attack. Emma was having more luck, changing herself to forms more suited to fight her brethren. Kryten spent most of his time refilling the power rings of Talky's group but the polymorphs kept coming, the cave walls pulsed and throbbed and more of the monsters peeled themselves from them and soon the team was overwhelmed. The polymorphs surrounded the group, many of them already had their feeding tubes extended. A polymorph advancing on Red Floof took on the form of her hair dresser, Red Floof growled with rage and shredded the beast with her claws only to find two more creatures replacing it, each in the form of people who had tormented her.

Lister found himself surrounded by all manner of Gelf, Simulant and creature, all of whom he'd encountered in the past and Cat and the Toaster were confronted by their worst nightmares. The circle of polymorphs closed on the group, teeth, claws and hair dressing implements waving inwards. A sudden blast of red ring energy carved a passage through the polymorphism revealing a figure in the door.

"Hello boys."

"Krissy." Lister said

The polymorph dropped Rimmer in a large cavern then landed next to him, it's feeding tube shot out then went limp. The polymorph whimpered in pain. Stalking forward the creature changed into a pile of coins which began to roll and slide over each other to move towards the orange hologram.

"Those are mine." Rimmer dashed forward reaching down to grab the coins, as his face got close some of the coins parted and the feeding tube shot out, again drooping before it could reach its prey. A grunt came from the coins and a clawed hand pushed out from the side and smashed into Rimmer's face knocking him back into a wall. A number of shapes moved into the centre of the of the room all becoming shiny, valuable looking items. Rimmer picked himself up and looked around.

"All these are mine." He said, running around the room. As he picked up a shiny foil rose a feeding tube shot out of the centre, Rimmer snapped his head back, narrowing avoiding the tube. With a snarl Rimmer closed his hand crushing the polymorph before it had time to change into anything bigger.

"Worthless fake." He muttered. "Oh shinny, mine." He said, chasing after another polymorph.

Lister and the others raced through the gap Kochanski had made.

"Hey Krissy, welcome back." Lister said

"Shut up and load up." Snapped Kochanski, cocking a red light bazookoid.

Mimicking Kochanski, Lister formed a green and opened fire on the regrouping monsters. It soon became apparent that the polymorphs could be killed if they were taken from behind. The group moved around the cave, keeping behind the shape changing monsters, the polymorphs numbers soon began to thin and a feeling of relief began to wash over the powered group.

A loud growl rumbled through the cavern, the polymorphs fell back against the cavern walls, changing shapes to hide in the shadows. The group formed a circle, weapons facing out.

"What's happening?" Lister asked.

Another growl rang out, the floor of the cavern shook from the sound and whimpers rang out from the walls.

"It's coming from outside." Red Floof shouted.

The group turned to the cavern entrance just in time to see a giant shape emerge into the cave. The giant polymorph flicked its tail, bring the opening down, as it advanced the walls began to chitter and chirp.


	18. Chapter 18 - Blue

Chapter 18 – Blue

The two scutters had finished the destruction of the nest and had headed up to help Bob in the main drive room. Wires were sticking out of all the consoles some of which were sparking. Almost every time Bob fixed one panel something blew else where. With the help of the other two scutters, Bob soon managed to regain control of the situation and two images flickered onto the screen and, after making a few final adjustments one of the images faded out, leaving the image of a middle aged, balding head.

"What's up scutters?" The face said, Bob blinked and sent a data burst to Hollys main frame.

"Oh, well we better find the others then..."

The console exploded, taking out one of the scutters, the screen flickered and Holly fought against an encroaching static.

"You can fix this? Can't you?" he asked Bob, the little scutter shrugged.

"Well we can only hope."

Something clinked and a small ring floated into the air and moved towards the damage.

"Holly, you have carried the hope of humanity for over three million years. Welcome to the blue lantern corps." The ring landed in the broken circuit board and flooded the system with blue light.

"What the smeg is that thing?" Lister shouted as they ran down the narrow passage, pursued by the huge Polymorph.

"They were originally called 'nest busters." Emma explained.

"So, it'll help us?" asked the Cat

"No, not really. They were another failed human experiment." Emma paused and sighed. "when the humans decided to get rid of us polymorphs, they tried a number of methods, all of which failed. Eventually they decided to fight fire with fire, they took polymorph DNA and made the nest busters, polymorphs made to hunt polymorphs."

"So, what went wrong?" Asked Cat

"The nest busters sided with us, they are part polymorph." Emma stopped and thought. "It does give us one advantage though. The nest busters can't handle a lot of emotion in one go, a modification the humans made to try to control them."

"So how does that help us?" Asked the Cat

Emma Sighed, "You all have weapons powered by emotion, just aim at it's mouth."

The rest of the group let out a collected "Oh", charged up their rings and all let loose with streams of light weapons. The nest buster roared and raised itself to its full height, bringing rocks and rubble down around it.

"Keep it up." Emma shouted.

The group continued firing and, eventually the nest buster fell to the ground blocking the passageway. Almost instantly the smaller polymorphs began to slither, ooze and slime through

every gap. The tem headed back down the tunnel and found themselves in a large cave filled with squished, shiny polymorphs. Rimmer was running around, chasing polymorphs. More and more polymorphs streamed into the cave, there shear number pressing the group back against the far wall. Barriers made out of ring light did little to hold the advancing hoard back, Red Floofs gun drone was soon over whelmed and the number of polymorphs made physical force ineffective. The creatures kept advancing.

Something sizzled, smoke started to rise off one of the monsters, then off another and another. A stream of blue light was raining down form the cave roof. As the group watched blue rain began to melt holes through the cave. As the blue rain hit the ring bearers, they began to feel empowered and strengthened. The polymorphs stopped their advance, their attention drawn to the hole in the roof. Red dwarf hung in the sky encased in a blue aura.

"That ship is dripping in hope, it could feed them for years." Emma gasped.

A polymorph grew wings and took off. Before it had even left the cave, it was shot down by blasts of orange light. Lister turned to the very back of the cave, where they'd left Rimmer only to see three men he recognised, all of them seemed to be made of orange light.

"What is happening?" Asked Lister

"It's the power of the orange lantern, the ring can recreate anyone the wearer has killed. Although I'd be surprised if this bozo has killed many people." Dex-Starr said.

"I think this cave about to get very full then." Lister said

"Why." Asked Dex-Starr

"Well Rimmer holds himself responsible for the death of the ships crew. He was the one who didn't seal the drive plate." Lister said.

The cave started to fill with orange replicas of the red dwarf crew all armed with pistols, bazookiods or knives. Most of the polymorphs began to fly up towards the red dwarf but the orange replacers followed them. Any remain polymorphs were taken care of by Lister and the others.


	19. Chapter 19 - The End

Chapter 19 – The End

The battle had lasted for over an hour. The sky had been lit up with orange warriors led by Rimmer and the polymorphs that had remained on land had soon been killed by Lister and the others, all of whom had been powered up by the blue light of hope that rained down from the red dwarf. When all the polymorphs had been killed Holly sent Bob and the remaining scutter down to the asteroid with flamethrowers for everyone. It took two more hours for everyone to search the caves and clear out the caverns. A cavern was found at the back full of aliens of all species all of which were dead. Another cavern was found with a number of ring bearers who were released. Kryten repowered the other members of the indigo tribe who, intern repowered members of the other corps until they were able to leave. Red Floof and Dex-starr accompanied the Dwarfers back to Red Dwarf.

"Right that should sort out Kristen, try taking the ring off." Holly said

Kochanski slid the red ring, now haloed in blue light, from her finger, the rest of the crew held their breath.

"I, I feel fine. A bit tired but fine."

Everyone breathed out.

"I thought you said a red ring couldn't be removed" Red Floof whispered to Dex-Starr.

"Well, if the rage heart can be replaced with something that cancels it out then there is always a chance." Dex-Starr hissed.

"I have enough charge if you want yours removed." Holly said to Red Floof, the cat woman looked at her ring for a second.

"No, no I think I'm all right. My life has been nothing but trouble since I got this thing but I still like what I can do with it. I don't have to put up with any er, smeg."

"I'm impressed and surprised." Dex-Starr said.

"How about the rest of you, do any of you lot need a hand."

The other Dwarfers all shook their heads and took of their rings. Dex-Starr batted one along the table "They're all nearly out of power anyway." Dex-Starr said

"And I'm done here. I've reloaded the toasters personality back into the proper hardware." Red Floof said.

"Thank, I'm just sorry we couldn't help you with that." Lister said, pointing at the broken gun droid.

"That's ok, I know some one who can help."

With all the rings collected Red Floof and Dex-Starr headed back toward earth and the Red Dwarf disappeared as they started the journey back to their own reality.


	20. Epilogue

Epilogue

"Howdy Doodly Do, would you like some toast."

"Yes please, two slices."

The toaster hummed with happiness as it cooked to the toast, after a few minuets his grill clicked and two pieces of toast shot into the air and disappeared.

"I'm still a hologram?" The Toaster asked.

"Well yes, but no. I did move your program back to your true body. I just kept a copy and pocketed a light bee." Red Floof said

"And I'm not a yellow lantern."

"I'm afraid not. Dex-Starr took all the rings and your's didn't have much power anyway." Said Red Floof.

"But why?"

"Well you are quite fun and you are very good at annoying Dex-Star and I like a project. Maybe one day I'll find a way of putting you into a toaster here."

"Well Ok. I Guess" Said the Toaster.

"I've got a couple of things to take care off, won't be long." Said Red Floof, walking towards her teleported.

After dropping her gun bot at the R&D department Red Floof strutted down the corridor towards the hair salon.

"Keep away from me you... Hang on, you've done something to your hair."

"Yes and all I had to do was take the love of a narcissist. Anyway, I came to say sorry and give you this." Red Floof threw a packaged on to hair dressers table. The hair dresser opened it up to find a set of razors and scissors.

"Thank, thanks you." He stammered.

"Well this is a turn up for the books."

Red Floof turned around to see Harley Quinn.

"Well I can't stay angry at some one I've already killed a few times." Red Floof said.

"How's that?" Asked Harley

"Oh, we ran into some shape shifters." Answered Red Floof.

"And they looked like me?" Asked the hair dresser.

"Only the ones who wanted to piss me off." Said Red Floof.

"And you're over the hair think. Isn't that bad for you? I mean if you're not angry." Said Harley

"Oh, I wouldn't worry about that. I've recently worked out that the multiverse is just a pile of smeg and there's plenty to get worked up about." With that Red Floof turned on her heels and headed back to the R&D department.


End file.
